Sunday after church Mary and I sliped off to Cracker Barrel for pecan Waffles. If you haven’t had pecan waffles at Cracker Barrel you haven’t had pecan waffles! I love them!
As we were seated I noticed a pleasant young lady at the table just in front of me with two sweet kids, probably twins, about four or five years old. I assumed the lady was the mother, but I was somewhat put off that she was talking on her cell phone; fortunately it was noisy enough in the restaurant that I could not hear her conversation. She was still talking when the waitress took our order; still talking when a waiter took food to the kids and their mom; still talking as they ate their food; still talking when our order came; still talking when she and her kids got up from the table to leave. Guess what! She hung up as they walked out, but even then she did not talk with either child!
I’m sorry to be judging this lady, but the kids were apparently accustomed to having no conversation at the table, they just sat and ate quietly. What do you think Mom will be complaining about ten years from now? She will be crying on every shoulder, including the kids teachers and their pediatrician that, “My kids never talk to me!” I personally wouldn’t blame them.
I can’t possibly imagine what was so important that would keep a mother from talking with her kids during a delicious breakfast! But I suspect that is her usual behavior. What a shame!
When questioning teens, in my practice, I found that those who ate fewer than five family meals per week were twice as likely to use drugs or alcohol or have sex while still in high school as those who sat down more frequently to eat with their family. Other factors may have been involved, but a study of 527 kids in Cincinnati showed that those who ate five or more meals per week with their family were better adjusted and less depressed than peers who ate fewer than three family meals a week. Furthermore, the kids who ate family meals did better in school, were less inclined to use drugs, and had better social skills.
Joseph A. Califano, Jr., chairman and president of Columbia University’s Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse, studied the association between family meals and drug abuse and concluded in the September 2007 quarterly report that “… preventing America’s drug problem is not going to be accomplished in court rooms, legislative hearing rooms, or classrooms, by judges, politicians, or teachers. It will happen in living rooms and dining rooms and across kitchen tables by the efforts of parents and families.”
This effect is due in large part to the conversation between parents and kids. And is diminished by watching TV, or listening to radios. I can’t think talking on the phone would improve anything! Food nourishes the body, conversation nourishes the mind, and togetherness nourishes the soul.
If you have kids, for their sake put the phone away, yours as well as theirs, when you are eating with them. It will make meals more enjoyable, and all your lives bette.
Taken, in part, from “Messengers in Denim.”