Mother Teresa
Today we continue the stories I spoke of at the Washington DC meeting of the Irish and American Paediatric Society.
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James, a model child, wanted to join the Army to follow the family tradition. Dad was in Dessert Storm, Granddad a Vietnam vet, and Great Grand Dad served in WW2.
After we finished the interview and physical exam I pushed back in my chair and asked, “James, what made you such an outstanding young man when so many of our nations black men your age are in jail? Do you have any suggestions that might help other parents?”
James looked into the distance, thought for a long minute, and said, “When I was little my mom wouldn’t let me cross the street but my cousin who lived across the street and down a couple of blocks was allowed to. I didn’t think that was fair, because he was younger than me.
Mom told me she cared about me too much to let anything happen to me. There was a hill just up the street and she worried I couldn’t see cars coming.”
Then he took an even longer pause, looked over my head, and continued, “You don’t need to have lots of things like computers or cell phones, all you need is someone who you know cares about you.”
I agreed, and dared to ask. “What does your cousin do now?”
James looked at the floor, “He’s in jail.”
Mother Teresa told us, “Love begins by taking care of the closest ones – the ones at home”.
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Eighteen year old Nat, born to a single mother, was joining the army to escape an abusive childhood. He was beaten by several of mother’s serial boyfriends; one raped him before he started kindergarten. When mother and the child’s molester faced the judge he reportedly told her she had to choose between her son and her boyfriend. She replied, “I’ll take my boyfriend.”
Thus began Nat’s experience in and out of foster homes. Mom soon became drug dependent and spent several terms in jail, each time loosing custody of Nat only to have him return to her when she was released.
She was in jail and he in a foster home as Nat neared the end of his high school junior year. He contacted his uncle who agreed to let Nat work in his saw mill in exchange for room, board, and a small salary.
That summer Nat saved enough to buy a “junker car”. He only needed two classes to graduate so he arranged his schedule so he only had to attend school Tuesdays and Thursdays. Uncle threw him out because he could not work full time.
Nat lived in his car until the end of Christmas vacation. He had no money left for food, so he was unable to eat during that time off of school. Towards the end of vacation he got out of his car one morning and fainted in the street. He was taken to the hospital by a passerby and given fluids and food. Social service was able to contact his grandmother who agreed to keep him until graduation.
I asked him how he managed to survive. “I’m a committed Christian,” he replied.
“Really?” I commented. “So am I, but just how did that help?”
“Jesus taught forgiveness.”
I was struck dumb and I’m sure my face showed it.
“Forgiveness,” he continued. “Is the basis of mankind! Man is the only animal who can forgive.”
Nat lived that truth: Forgiveness is the basis of Mankind!
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We aren’t required to be Mother Teresa, but we must love like she loved, and forgive like He forgave.
Final on Thursday,
P/S., Please share if you love and care for kids.