Recently, I was introduced to a young mother. As we were talking she told me that she approached the next few years with some apprehension because three years from now her son will be old enough to drive. “That’s pretty exciting,” I told her.
“It is for him, and maybe for you, but for me it’s scary.”
“Why is that?” I inquired. “Don’t you feel he is trust worthy?”
“He is now, but I don’t know what he’ll be like when he gets into the teen years.” She looked away and I spied tears starting. “You’re a pediatrician, you know how teenagers are,” she added.
And I do, so I told her most teens are great but, they are like the rest of us; a few can ruin the reputation of many. If he is a good kid now, the chances are he will be a good teen. Change is always difficult, and requires effort.
It is unfortunate that teens in general have a bad reputation. Dr. Pittman, a psychiatrist in Atlanta, says that after a person has been a parent for 13 years he or she is generally tired and ready for anything but a teenager. And teens need as much parenting as infants, perhaps more; the difference is that parenting teens is fun!
In short, teens become what they are programmed to become; kind of like computers. Imagine how much help a teen can give you when he can jump into the car and go to the store, pick up his little sister, drive himself to football practice, or to bible study! Your life will be simpler, and you will have time to enjoy parenting him. Remind your teen every time you have a chance of how happy you will be when he gets his driver’s license and that you can’t wait to let drive and do things to help you out! You should even tell him you won’t have to worry about his being a good driver because he has, or will have by then, good judgment, and you can trust him. Share with him the excitement of that accomplishment.
Teens really are programmable! They become what they perceive you and society want them to become. Let them know what you have in mind and how proud you are of them now and how much prouder you will become as they mature into men and women of character. And remember to be the person you want them to become.